Author Topic: Talking Dog.....  (Read 3231 times)

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Offline lammy

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Talking Dog.....
« on: January 28, 2013, 19:29:19 PM »
DOG FOR SALE

A man sees a sign outside a house -

'Talking Dog For Sale .'

He rings the bell, the owner appears

And tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden.

The man sees a very nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there.

"Do you really talk?" he asks the dog.


"Yes," the Labrador replies.



After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk,


The man asks, "So, tell me your story."


The Labrador looks up and says,


"Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young.


I wanted to help the government, so I told the Secret Service.

In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country

Sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders.

Because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping,

I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years."


 



"But the jetting around really tired me out,


And I knew I wasn't getting any younger

I decided to settle down.

I signed up for a job at Heathrow Airport

To do some undercover security work,

Wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.

I uncovered some incredible dealings

And was awarded several medals.


I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."




The man was amazed


He goes back into the house and asks the owner


How much he wants for the dog.

"Ten quid," the owner says.


"?10.....!!? But this dog is absolutely amazing!

Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"



"Because he's a liar,

He's never been out of the garden."

Offline markse495

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Re: Talking Dog.....
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2013, 19:43:31 PM »
an irishman caught the bus ...replies sod me shamus ..that was fookin heavy ;) ;D

Mse495
If it aint ESSEX! It aint fair!

Offline markse495

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Re: Talking Dog.....
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2013, 19:48:52 PM »
DOG FOR SALE

A man sees a sign outside a house -

'Talking Dog For Sale .'

He rings the bell, the owner appears

And tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden.

The man sees a very nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there.

"Do you really talk?" he asks the dog.


"Yes," the Labrador replies.



After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk,


The man asks, "So, tell me your story."


The Labrador looks up and says,


"Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young.


I wanted to help the government, so I told the Secret Service.

In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country

Sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders.

Because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping,

I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years."


 



"But the jetting around really tired me out,


And I knew I wasn't getting any younger

I decided to settle down.

I signed up for a job at Heathrow Airport

To do some undercover security work,

Wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.

I uncovered some incredible dealings

And was awarded several medals.


I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."




The man was amazed


He goes back into the house and asks the owner


How much he wants for the dog.

"Ten quid," the owner says.


"?10.....!!? But this dog is absolutely amazing!

Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"



"Because he's a liar,

He's never been out of the garden."

I WILL say your jokes good lammy :D even if everyone elses thinks me jokes and me need linchin!! ;)
If it aint ESSEX! It aint fair!

Offline RodOGW

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Re: Talking Dog.....
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2013, 20:48:03 PM »
Yes .. I really liked that joke and will be stealing it..